4 years now

It's been over four years now since Eva and I met. We hooked up online a few days before Christmas 2004 and started to chat regularly the next January.

It's not surprising that we have both grown alot in that year, both internally and in our relationship together.

Initially we had no intention of getting into a relationship. I had just left along term long term relationship (LTLDR) the year before and I wasn't ready to get close again to someone, especially someone online.

We met on an Irish language forum called Irish Gaelic Translation Forum. I used to hang out there the years previous to our meeting, mostly translating phrases and well-wishes from English to Irish. I left though when the forum got very busy and grew and new people came involved who were better in translation and in their Irish skills than I. I am not sure why I was back surfing the board that December but I saw a post that picked my interest. It was by an Estonian girl (just 17) who wished to learn Irish. I contacted her and it went from there.

As I said above, there was no intention at first to get close but the more we chatted and got to know each other the more fascinated both of us became. I remember in the summer of 2005 I told her that I didn't want a relationship and that she wasn't my friend. In truth I was afraid of my feelings and I was afraid of another LDR.

The next September, amongst the feelings of homesickness, brought on by being in France at the start of my ERASMUS programme, I told her I loved her. You could say September 2005 was the official start of our amorous relationship. The first time we met in person was Easter 2006 when I spent 2 weeks in Estonia. She came to Ireland the first time in summer 2006 and so we started the back-and-forth comings-and-goings between the two countries.

Perhaps the biggest test for our relationship was when we moved in together into her grandparents' house in September 2007. I had of course lived together during the summers but this felt different. It wasn't the summer anymore, it wasn't Ireland. She had college, I had a serious job and it was starting to get colder. That year was very tough on both of us and sometimes we argued so badly that I thought our relationship was over.

We pulled through though. We grow together and learned how to love each other. It was a lesson in growing up. The thing that was particularly difficult for me was the culture shock. I didn't speak the language so I felt completely lost. I had to turn to Eva for everything. I felt like a child, be it at the kitchen table, with her family, at the pharmacy, the shops...I was frustrated because I had to communicate with people through her and she got tired of translating. Add to this the fact that she was the only one I socialised with - at work as a teacher I either spent time with younger students or older colleagues, I was between two worlds - things got very strained.

Things are much calmer now and I simply can not think of life without her. She's my sunshine that brightens up my day. I know it sounds cheesy and trite but it's true. She's my princess and I love her deeply.

In October 2008 we got engaged. What's next? Marriage, home, kids...I can't see myself with anyone else. We really are two sides of the same coin. In ways we are very different and yet we are so the same as well. It's a good mix. Let's hope it brings us much luck. We had even thought about the name of our first kid: Saibh-Riin if it's a girl and Jasper-Rónán if it's a boy.* I think they have a good ring to them.

* Pronouned: sighv reen and yasper ronawn.